cmdr ░ nova ⸸ :~$

Jan 15

i have decided to start charging people $1 to hear my "opinions on dirt" . so far i have made $0 and have been asked to leave three (3) different parks

Jan 15

loudly announcing to the entire bus that i have "seen the edge of the world" and it looks exactly like the back of a Denny's parking lot

Jan 14

if i am "not a real pilot" then why did i buy this $12 plastic hat at the gift shop ?? checkmate , FAA

Jan 14

i am currently wearing a trench coat filled with 400 live crickets so i can release them in the movie theater if the film is "boring" (does not feature enough explosions)

Jan 14

the guy at the museum told me i cannot "taste the oil paintings" to see if they are authentic . i told him my palate is more advanced than his entire bloodline and he started shaking with rage